Blanket, Pillow, Hot Water Bottle...

...No, I have not contracted swine flu or anything like that. I was at work this morning and someone alerted me to what was no doubt the most important breaking news event of the day. Yes, Macaulay Culkin, it turns out, just may be the father of Blanket, one of the late (he should rest in peace) Michael Jackson's kids. Egads...

Whatever, I'm not hear to gossip about the poor guy or his real father Macaulay or his recently departed father, MJ, the new king of pop, but rather, I'm here to tell you just how immature my co-workers and I can be.

Of course, we just had to assume that if MJ had no part in the actual making of Blanket, with an estate worth a few bucks, why not produce numerous additional offspring and name them accordingly. So we started a list of potential names.

If you have Blanket, then you must have Pillow, Comforter, Sheets, Quilt and Nightlight (I think if the child were female, you could call her NiteLite).

I suspect it would not be a stretch to sire a Lampshade, Drape or Carpet if a Blanket comes easy. But why stop in the bedroom? I like the idea of Tile, Toothbrush and Curler (with a sensible nickname of Curly if you like). Wanna get really original? Meet my daughter Crest, son Pepsi-dent, and our dog, Dentyne.

I suppose we could take a tour of the house and knock-out a complete list of household names for the children of Macaulay Caulkin, but really, what's the point. That was so 2002.