Dave

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Sunday, March 1, 2009

Handicapped Parking Rage: Strange in HEB

So we had to hit the HEB Plus over on Potranco for our Sunday grocery refill and as we were walking in, I heard an older guy shouting. No, really screaming at the top of his lungs. Naturally, I stopped to seek the source of this excitement, and naturally pulled my camera from my pocket to ensure I had functioning batteries in case anything funny happened.

From what I could see, there was a Prius parked in the white lined out area next to a handicapped parking slot. The man was at the driver's side window of the car parked in the handicapped slot, yelling at the older lady driver inside. Of course, I just assumed it was a husband attempting to teach his wife proper parking.

But then I noted that the man started to leave his position of screamage, and head toward the Prius. The man was gesticulating wildly (and who doesn't like to see that in a public place?) and he actually went back to the car in the handicapped slot a few more times to scream some more.

As entertaining as this was, I realized that this older pissed off man was not in fact the driving instructor of the lady in the car parked in the handicapped slot, and for a moment, I began to walk toward the scene figuring I might have to bust a cap or something. Okay, I don't even know what that means, but tough talk is easy when your opponent is 90.
I stopped short when Gramps got in his Prius and began to back-up from his position in the lined-out (meaning: no parking) place where he was at. That little Prius had a back-up beeper that sounded just like the ones you hear at 5 AM on a garbage truck in the city. And thankfully so. He was about to back right into a truck. Luckily, he stopped in time, then went forward against traffic and found another handicapped slot to park in.

So after all the excitement, the lady who was parked in the handicap slot, the one who the old guy was shrieking at, started to get out of her car. My wife quickly went over to her and offered to walk with her into the store in case the lunatic in the Prius attempted to confront her once she was out of her car. The very nice lady thanked my wife but told us that she was more than capable of taking care of herself as related to the blowhard. Turns out, he was upset that she got the spot before him so he confronted her. But what sent him over the edge was that she told him he could not park illegally in the striped area adjacent to the handicapped slot he wanted. I can't wait to hit 90. I'll start a blog about old people.
Later, as we were walking through the HEB doing our shopping, I spotted Gramps loading up on the wine. If this is your Gandpa, I hope you will alert him to the dangers of mixing wine and Geritol.

Strange.


4 comments:

Albatross said...

It's amazing the value people place on a parking space that's marginally closer to the front door than the next available one.

Buzzardbilly said...

My Dad was an amputee, so if I'm in a screaming bitch mood and I see one of those non-handicapped-I'm-so-important-I'll-just-take-the-handispace-and-limp-a-little batards, it's one of my bitchiest bitch joys. It's an oral orgasm without the sex organs. I'm probably going to Hell for this (and many other things) but, one Christmas Eve, I got so angry at watching this poor old fella in an obviously suped up paraplegic or double-amputee handivan searching fruitlessly for a handispot at the Mall and all were taken by non-handimarked cars, that I called the police and got them to come out and give Christmas Eve tickets to all the bastards making it tough for a handicapped person to get their last-minute holiday stuff done. I waited until I saw him arrive and start ticketing before I left the parking lot with a Grinchy smile.

Never saw two valid parkers fight over a space like that either.

I love public gesticulating. The wilder, the better.

Great post.

Anonymous said...

Eva says:)

The older woman was a guest in out poor city and that man did scare her. I told her not to worry that my hubby was a big gent and that he was not about to let anyone harass her. Nice way to make Texas the friendly State. What an ass.

Anonymous said...

......i would of called security..then told grandpa..thats no way to talk to a lady..the nerve..your husband should of taken a pic...displayed him ..as being an a....

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San Antonio, TX, United States
I love to observe the odd things happening around me as I go about my day. I especially like it when I can get a picture of people being themselves. Here, I attempt to report the various people and events I have encountered in my neighborhood, and my city. I'd also love to hear from you. Feel free to e-mail your experiences and photos of life in San Antonio.

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