Dinner Report: A Big Mac...

If you have read this blog during the last two years, you have witnessed some really unhealthy eating. As that one guy on Sons of Anarchy (the guy who had most his fingers cut off in an effort to persuade him from some compulsive behavior), I am happy to say, "I'll own that". You could perhaps hope that I might announce I have become vegan and turn you on to all the great restaurants that serve only salads and mac & cheese and such, but that is not very likely at this juncture.

In fairness though, in spite of all the barbecue and pizza and wonderful burgers my wife and I have consumed over time, I am happy to report that our consumption of McDonald's has been extremely limited. It isn't that I don't appreciate McDonald's for what it is, fast and cheap, but really, it rarely appeals to me these days.

Earlier in the week, I came home from work and my wife asked me if I would consider a Big Mac for supper. I had to look around for a few minutes to see if I was on Candid Camera. But sure enough, she had a craving for a Big Mac and so off we went to the 'Donald's near our house.
The drive-thru does a pretty brisk business, but inside, the place was dead. You may have experienced this same sort of thing in your visits to many fast food places, where they have one guy cooking, one person in the drive-thru and a manager doing everything else. Running the front counter, making the fries, helping the drive-thru person get their order. Oh the memories I have of working at BranMac and turning back-to-back-to-back $1,000 hours, when at today's prices, that would be about $5,000 in an hour. That's a lot of burgers and fries and triple thick shakes. I would go for 2 hours straight making burger and macs, six and twelve on the turn. Good times.

But now, it seems like the charm of it all is gone. I just don't care for McDonald's, even if they have delicious, irresistible fries. There is something about the experience that ruins it for me. The 17 year old girl staring at you from the counter, waiting for you, the customer to initiate the order process. The cell phone in one hand as she punches in your order with no interest in suggestive selling a hot apple pie to go with your super-sized McCrap. I'm sure the McDonald's by your house is clean and totally above board, but I can't help thinking that the gang-member cook is tagging my burger with his own special sauce. And it isn't just McDonald's, but you know that.

On this particular day, we went in and ordered the combo (not super-sized) and just because I couldn't resist, I also got one of the double cheeseburgers. I mean really, for a buck? How could you not get the double cheeseburger?
The double cheeseburger is like dessert to me. It is so disturbingly greasy that it simply slides down your gullet like melted butter. Just look at it: you could grease your axle with it. But I ate it all.

I have been concerned for years about the buns on the Big Mac. Specifically, I don't think they toast them the way we did in the late 70's and early 80's. The club portion of the bun is supposed to be toasted just like the bottom and the crown, and this doesn't seem to happen. Maybe the procedure has changed, or maybe someone is talking on their cell phone.

Anyway, there was that familiar taste and in spite of the fact the little tasteless burgers just don't look very appetizing, I confess that we both enjoyed the meal. My wife eats her Big Mac in the standard delivery. That is to say, she takes in the two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions on a sesame seed bun like a normal burger.
I on the other hand always eat my Big Mac in two parts. I eat from the club bun up like it was a burger by itself, then I eat the bottom portion like a pizza. Something I started when I was about 16 and just never have changed. By the way, there really should be more onions on that patty.
If you get the feeling that this is all very unhealthy, you are probably right. And McDonald's gives you the facts. There it is. I just ate enough calories for an entire week in a single setting. That ought to hold me over for another year or so.